Communication in marriage has been known to be a challenging activity. Having the difficult conversations raises the ante and risk for harsh fighting . But perhaps one of the most difficult conversations married people have is about Sex. We all want to have earth shattering cataclysmic great sex. Many time bringing up sex with your spouse is a recipe for hurt feelings, bruised egos and arguments. However. the fact remains if we want to have fulfilling sex which gratifies our marriage and ourselves personally, we have to be able to talk about sex with our spouses .
So let’s get down to business here. If your spouse has been faking satisfaction or you have, it might be a good time to talk about how each of you could do the special sensual touch things that would make your marital sex climb to higher heights.
We would all understand why you wouldn’t want to rock the boat. At least you’re having sex so why ruin it with a bunch of conversation. I could not agree more, you don’t want to do something that could jeopardize the sex you get in your marriage. Then you would have to join the line at the water cooler of married person who are not getting any. That would really be counterproductive.
Fact is many people have their taboo topics in their marriages which is a strong disincentive to just leave well enough alone. Some example are not having an orgasm, wanting a change in positions, talking about your fantasies, room lighting and so many more can keep a couple from even thinking about talking let alone having a conversation about sex.
But hold everything now! Your sex life has fallen into numbness because your not having any and you therefore have a choice . To talk or not to talk. Not talking will feel safe but your sex life will continue to diminish. Talking about it might be the magic that keeps sex alive in your marriage.
So your sex life has diminished for a while. Perhaps it’s time to crank the matter up again. Sometimes your clothes need a tailor and your car a tune up. Well when your sex life is low to no and in need of repairs, it takes courage to have conversations about sex but you really can do it and then you might be doing more of it.
It’s time to start thinking about what you say to your love partner. How you to let someone know something like Honey this is what I like or this make me feel good has a good deal to do with the outcome of your very special and courageous attempt.
In fact, it wouldn’t hurt to explore your own sexual playground and set it up like an experiment. The only experiment that has ever failed is the one you have not tried. Explore the ambiance for mood and definitely explore your grooming and dress. Most importantly either explore your own body as you may already have when feeling a bit Randy which is a great way to know what feels good. Another way is let your partner help you find the special places that work for you.
Here’s one more important thing. Some people like to talk in nice words like Let’s Make Love that just does it for them like fireworks. Others you might be surprised to find out love to hear it raw like Let’s F—. or Yes do it harder that way. I mention this to be honest and realistic about human beings males and females because as you know we think and fantasize about the wildest things. Even more crucial is exploration and play because it’s really good to know and maybe even fun to find out so we can make IT happen for the people we love.
There are books and blogs which can help you get started in how to talk about sex and that would be a good first move to get informed about a problem you’re having just to get some background.
In this article we’ve spoken about sex and intimacy, for more CLICK HERE to find out the ONE sentence you can use to get the intimacy BACK marriage today (even if you’ve been married more than 10 years)!